Moving on....

....letting go.

Someone from my past died this week. My reaction was not one of grief but one of release. As far as I know she did not suffer from any devastating illness or terminal physical disease. My sense is that she needed to let go of all the ill-considered decisions she had made in her life and the suffering she had caused for other people. From my vantage point, I saw her as someone who could not embrace her own essence. She always had to be right. And she was skilled at manipulating circumstances so she felt she was right. And she was very good at it.

I think she found herself in an intolerable situation with a business that was failing, a reputation that had declined significantly. She was not someone who could "cut her losses and move on." She was defeated on all levels. I feel compassion for her family, now left without a mother, wife, and aunt. And for those who will have to shoulder the responsibilities of cleaning up what is left.

Indeed, she had both a positive and negative impact on my life. I thank her for her gifts and forgive her for the wounds she tried to inflict. This does not feel like a major loss to me right now. When our friendship/business relationship ended in 2006, I grieved the loss of a dream of what could have been. I moved on. It was time.

How does one's spirit become so damanged that life cannot go on? Is it possible that this was her final choice? Or that her karma has directed her into other lessons?

Peace......