Wednesday, February 22, 2012

A Glimmer....

...of light.

There was still a glimmer of daylight on the horizon when I left yoga practice tonight at 645.  Spring is coming.  It was almost 50 degrees outside and I could smell spring in the air.  I had to pause for a deep breath of the fresh air.

It's been an easy winter as far as weather is concerned.  We had only one major storm, only two really bad days for driving... the rest have been brief warm short-lasting bursts of snow.  I'm so not a winter person, so this has been an easy one.  But the short days always make me feel sort of down and blue and tired.  Some of the energy is coming back.

Another darkness is resolving, as my primary Sivananda teacher will be headed back this week.  He's been gone four months and I've missed him tremendously.  We've talked a few times and emailed and texted, but so much has happened and changed within ... I've missed his amazing compassionate spirit and willing ear.  We already have a session scheduled for the week he gets back...

A light at the end of the tunnel...  spring is coming... again.  Shanti Om.

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Ashram....

.... inside my head.

Seems there is a lot going on right now.  Work is super busy, students with colds/sore throats/sinus infections (no flu yet... we're crossing our fingers).  Big brew-ha-ha with my nurses' association, lots of secrecy and back handedness going on.  I'm not happy with that at all.  And a big campus production this weekend of Eve Ensler's Vagina Monologues (and I'm on stage this year)....  so I've been feeling pulled in many directions.  

One of the things I brought back from the ashram was a CD of the chants they sing daily.  I so loved the kirtan sessions, even tho I wasn't always sure what I was singing or how to pronounce the words.  There is something about the energy of the music and syllables that spoke to me on a very deep level.   The CD can still take me back to those sessions.  I play it in the car and sing along.  I play it in my office and let the words send their calming energy to my surroundings.

Today, we had students 20 deep waiting for urgent care, my appts were full and I had a student trainer in tow.   And a yoga class at 530.  I got out at 5 and headed across town to class.  Traffic was clogged and I could feel my anxiety rising, not to mention that deep seated anger at stupid drivers (not me, of course!).  I popped the CD in, and sang along with whatever chant came up... and in the 20 minutes it took me to get to the east side of town, I felt much calmer.  Class was slow and deliberate and wonderful.   What was even better was being able to sit down, cross my legs and start to breathe deeply and feel the stress melt away. 

It occurred to me that I can carry the ashram with me.  During savasana, I felt like I was back in the Yoga Hall, feeling the quiet and the sense of peace.   Now the trick is to keep it going.....